"Bravery at it's Finest..."

I don't know who was more brave this morning, me or Elijah Brooks. For awhile, we have been talking about how the paci (otherwise called a "pah" - as in the word "hat"), is going to go away one day. I have always been completely up front and honest with Elijah Brooks since he could first understand me, and have been matter of fact with him about everything. He doesn't like surprises and very much likes to be prepared in advance for whatever is about to happen - VERY much like his mommy! So, we have been talking about it for a few weeks and he knew that the day would be coming when he could "trade" his paci's in for some new John Deere tractors. I have been waiting for somewhat of a slow week, when we wouldn't have to be away from him at nighttime or naptime. This week seemed like the best week, since we do not have to go to foster care training tomorrow night - we get a week off - and there are no church activities tomorrow night because of Spring Break. This morning, he and I talked about it for a few minutes and then loaded up in the car to go to Tractor Supply Company. He put his paci's in a little plastic bag and held onto them until we got to the store. He was so excited to see so many lawnmowers outside that he could sit on and ride, that he didn't even want to go inside and look for his new beloved tractor! I finally pulled him away from outside to go inside and choose his new toy. He chose a "Model A" tractor, just like the one on his video, and a few small (matchbox car size) tractors and mowers. I asked him if he was ready to take his "pah's" to Ms. Lisa at the checkout counter and trade them in for his new tractors. He said that he was, but obviously I was alittle hesitant because I took my time and even walked around the store 2 more times just stalling!! Clearly, I was more anxious than he was. We got up to the counter and he handed the little bag of paci's over to the lady at the counter and yelled at the top of his lungs, "BYE BYE PAH'S"!! She rang us up and put his tractors in the bag, to which he proudly carried them outside and hopped right back on the lawnmowers. I was seriously about to cry, but did a good job of being brave myself! This was a HUGE moment - those paci's have been with us for a long time and were like a good friend. Yes, they were so gross and probably should have been tossed out a long time ago, but they were still pretty sentimental. We had transitioned a long time ago to just having the paci in the bed and he wasn't allowed to carry it around during the day and he did great with that transition. He has a mound of blankets and stuffed animals in his bed that I sincerely hope will become his new "best friends" during sleep.

When it was time for his nap today, he looked in every slat of his crib to see if he could find an extra one hanging out, but no luck. He told me one time that he didn't want his tractors anymore, but then in the very next breath he said he wanted to go downstairs and play with them. It took over an hour for him to go to sleep (and finally had to have some help from mommy), but I was proud of him. He never once cried for his paci - he cried for me - but not for his paci. And, he talked incessantly!!!! I knew the boy could talk, but WOW, he can really talk!

I am fully prepared for a few rough nights this week, but another reason I chose this week is because for some reason, it has been taking him alot longer to fall asleep at night anyway. I thought, why not just start fresh today with a "new normal". I have been delaying the inevitable for quite some time and I figured that there is no time like the present. He is 28 months old.

Towards the middle of the week, I may completely be regretting this spur of the moment decision (I called Jay on the way to the tractor store to tell him), but going "cold turkey" on the potty training worked for us. I am hopeful we will get through yet another major milestone in the life of a toddler. There is always something isn't there?

Pictures to come - yes, I took my camera to Tractor Supply to document. My only regret is that I didn't get a picture of him actually handing the little baggie over the counter, but I didn't really want to call too much attention to the actual moment for his sake. That could have backfired in a major way!

I am really beginning to sense that my "baby" is growing up now. There are so few things now to remind me of his "babyhood" - no diapers, no paci etc...... He is still in his crib, so I guess that will be the next hurdle. He still curls up in my lap to be rocked (though his legs hang out the window now), so I am trying to hold on to this as long as I can. If he wants me to rock him when he's 12, I will rock him until his heart is content. It's quite doubtful this will ever happen, but a momma can dream I guess.